Is this mine?

Sometimes – often, actually – we are carrying around things that just aren’t ours. We carry them around and we trip over them all the time.

Most of this baggage is some form of conditioning or an empathic response. There’s past, present and even potentially future conditioning.

Past conditioning is a combination of other people’s thoughts, fears, worries and beliefs that have become our “shoulds”, as well as our own historical experiences that are shaping our current thoughts, rules or even our hidden beliefs. Conditioning can feel pretty subtle simply because we’re so accustomed to the thoughts that we think they’re our own.

Present conditioning is how we’re being influenced by what’s going on around us now. What are the things that are weighing on us, shaping us, influencing us? What are we allowing in? Social media? News? Fears or preoccupations of friends and family?

Future conditioning is a new concept to me. I’m still working on it, but I think that hopes, expectations and assumptions are a big part.

And for you empaths out there, we are always taking on other people’s stuff and getting it confused with our own. We can react as if it’s ours if we aren’t aware.

The most helpful thing to do is to stop and ask the question, “Is this mine?” When we do, we can see some interesting patterns as we sort. Not mine! Not mine! Definitely not mine? Um, maybe?

I like to think of conditioning as a pair of glasses with somebody else’s prescription. When we take them off, things look very different. When we wear our own glasses, it’s much easier to see what’s going on around us more clearly, to read the signs and to navigate. It feels so much better, too. Less confusing. Definitely less of a headache.

Our own stuff is enough to carry. Isn’t it time that we put down the things that aren’t ours and lighten the load?

I know that I mixed the metaphors of baggage and glasses. That is 100% mine!

In the meantime, remember these things: You are loved. We are all loved. Let’s all be kind. And in all things – progress, not perfection!

Love and light,


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