when the switch flips

There is this thing that happens occasionally for me.

I don’t understand it. I don’t know what causes it. I certainly can’t predict when it will happen. I don’t know what it means. But I recognize it when it happens.

A switch inside me flips.

In one moment, I am different from the previous moment.

Sometimes it is related to something simple and (relatively)unimportant, such as a preference. One season I drink cherry limeade. All the time. It’s my drink. Then one day, I don’t. I drink iced tea. I have less than zero interest in a thing that was normal for me before.

That’s a small example, but it’s pretty representative of what I’m talking about. I didn’t gradually get tired of one flavor. I didn’t run out of one and just buy another. I didn’t make a conscious decision, and it isn’t boredom. At one point, one thing seemed right for me. The switch flipped, and then it didn’t.

This does happen with bigger things, too. I was pretty obsessed with ceramics for a few years. Then one day, the switch flipped and I wasn’t. I still had a kiln and a lot of clay, tools and glazes to donate. But I was just done.

For me, it also happens with relationships. With groups. With schools of thought. With religion. Even habits – one day I smoked, the next I didn’t, and haven’t for 30+ years.

I know that some of it has to do with personality, of course. I’m all in, then I’m not. But it also has to do with seasons, I think. In life there are seasons, and we change our leaves to adjust. Sometimes it’s a gradual thing. Sometimes the switch flips.

I wonder why some changes are so sudden and absolute. Why are some changes so gradual that you barely notice? Or some are evolutionary, but you can still trace them?

I hope that I never flip the curiosity switch. If I do, I guess that will be a sign that it’s time to move on to the next adventure.

I’m curious. How does it work for you?

In the meantime, remember these things: You are loved. We are all loved. Let’s all be kind. And in all things – progress, not perfection!

Love, and light in the pages,

Maggie

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2 Comments

  1. Christopher October 27, 2023 at 4:58 am

    I love this post. It really speaks to me. All of your writing does, actually, but this one spoke up a little louder than usual. 😉 “I wonder why some changes are so sudden and absolute. Why are some changes so gradual that you barely notice? Or some are evolutionary, but you can still trace them?” Yes and yes. And what I love the most is how much we trust this type of change; how much we can and we do. “Switch knowledge,” if I may, is one of the few categories of information that I feel I can know and trust absolutely, and therefore, act upon, without the doubt, fear, second-guessing, or other troublesome states that seem to accompany so much other knowledge and information I encounter everyday. Long live the switch, flicked from someplace deep inside!! And thank you for highlighting it to me.

    Reply
    1. Maggie Huffman October 27, 2023 at 11:15 am

      Switch knowledge! Yes! I, too, trust it so readily without all the sabotaging extras!

      Reply

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